Save-the-dates six to twelve months out. Invitations six to eight weeks before the day. Replies due three to four weeks before. Those are the conventional windows and they suit most local weddings - but they are not the ones to start from. Start from the date your caterer needs a final head count, and work backwards.
Why you work backwards
Every date in a wedding timeline is set by the one after it. The caterer needs confirmed numbers on a particular day. You need time before that to chase the people who have not answered. The replies need time to arrive. The invitation needs to be in hand before that.
Plan it forwards from your engagement and you will pick dates that sound tidy and discover, six weeks out, that final numbers were due a fortnight ago. Plan it backwards and every date has a reason.
The timeline
| When | What | Why then |
|---|---|---|
| 12 - 6 months | Save-the-dates | Date and venue are locked; guests can protect the weekend before anything else claims it. |
| 4 - 3 months | Guest list finalised | Numbers, addresses and phone numbers settled before you need them in a hurry. |
| 8 - 6 weeks | Invitations sent | Close enough that people still have the weekend free, far enough to plan travel. |
| 4 - 3 weeks | RSVP deadline | Leaves a full week or more to chase before the caterer’s date. |
| 3 - 2 weeks | Chase non-repliers | The stragglers are always the same people. Give yourself room for them. |
| 2 - 1 weeks | Final numbers to suppliers | The date you got in writing at the start. |
| 1 week | Seating, timings, details | Only possible once the count is real rather than expected. |
When to move the dates
Destination weddings
Send save-the-dates as early as you can and invitations four to five months ahead. Guests are booking flights, arranging accommodation and taking leave - three things with their own deadlines, none of which bend for you. Give the travel information at the same time as the invitation, not later.
Guests flying in for a local wedding
If a meaningful part of the list is coming from abroad, push invitations to about three months, and move the reply deadline out with them rather than leaving it at three to four weeks - a guest booking flights is answering a different question from one driving across town. You do not need to move the whole timeline for four people, but you do need to tell those four earlier than everyone else - which is easier when the invitation is a link you send per guest rather than a print run that goes out in one batch.
Peak season and holidays
A summer Saturday, a long weekend or anything near a public holiday competes with everyone else’s plans. Move save-the-dates earlier rather than moving the invitations earlier - the invitation still works best at six to eight weeks; it is the hold that needs the head start.
Short engagements
Under three months from engagement to wedding, skip save-the-dates entirely and send the invitation as soon as the venue is confirmed. Then chase actively rather than waiting - at this notice, silence is usually a diary clash, not a decision.
What to send when
The two mailings do different jobs, and the most common mistake is making the save-the-date do the invitation’s work.
A save-the-date carries the names, the date, the town and a line saying a proper invitation follows. That is all. It does not need the venue address, the timings, the dress code or a reply mechanism - and it should not ask for one, because you will get replies from people you have not finished deciding about.
An invitation carries everything: who is hosting, the full date and time, the venue, what happens afterwards, and how to reply by when. If you are unsure how to phrase any of that, there is a full guide to invitation wording with worked examples.
Setting the reply deadline
Three to four weeks before the day, for a local list. The test is not how it looks on the card - it is whether it leaves you a clear week between the deadline and the caterer’s date, because that week is entirely spent chasing.
Expect the replies to arrive in a particular shape: a burst in the first day or two from the people who are certain, a long flat middle, then a second burst after a reminder. Plan for the reminder rather than hoping you will not need it. There is more on picking and enforcing the date in the guide to RSVP deadlines.
The timeline is easier when the date can change
Everything above assumes the information is fixed once it leaves your hands, because on paper it is. That assumption is what makes the timeline stressful: send too early and you carry the risk of a change for months, send too late and you lose replies.
If the invitation is a page rather than a card, a moved start time or a corrected venue is an edit rather than a reprint. It is not an announcement, though: the edit keeps the invitation true for anyone opening it from now on, and telling the people who already read the old version is still a message you send - there is a separate guide on changing details after sending. It does not remove the need for a timeline - guests still need notice, and caterers still need numbers - but it takes the fear out of sending early.
Frequently asked questions
When should wedding invitations be sent?
Conventionally six to eight weeks before the wedding for a local guest list. Push it to three months if a meaningful number of guests are travelling internationally, and to four or five months for a destination wedding where people need to book flights and take leave.
When should save-the-dates go out?
Six to twelve months before, and as soon as the date and venue are both locked. A save-the-date sent before the venue is confirmed is a promise you might have to take back.
Is it ever too early to send invitations?
Yes. Beyond about three months for a local wedding, guests file it away and forget it, and you have given yourself a longer window in which their plans can change. That is what save-the-dates are for - hold the date early, invite properly later.
How late is too late?
Under four weeks and you are asking people to rearrange a weekend they have probably already committed. It is survivable - send digitally, chase directly, and accept a lower reply rate - but expect to be phoning rather than waiting.
Do we need save-the-dates at all?
Only if there is a real gap between knowing your date and being ready to invite properly. If your invitations are going out nine months ahead anyway, a save-the-date is an extra thing to design, pay for and chase.
Should everyone get a save-the-date?
Only people who will definitely be invited. A save-the-date is a commitment - there is no polite way to send one and then not follow it with an invitation. If your guest list is not settled, wait.
What if the date changes after we have sent them?
On paper it is a reprint and a round of apologetic messages. If the invitation lives on a page, the date is an edit, and anyone opening their link from then on sees the current version. An edit is not an announcement, though - people who already read the old date are still working from it, so you still tell them directly, and treat any reply given before the change as provisional.
Related: Save-the-date wording · Invitation wording · Setting an RSVP deadline · The full planning checklist · The final head count